Please Do Not Click for English

ALBANY, N.Y. - Spring language program deadlines are approaching, and I'm frantically trying to decide where to spend the next year or so of my life. The process is much like undergraduate admissions, with more Chinglish.

At Peking University's page for international students, prospective students are told the "Application Period is from November 1." Does this mean the school accepts applications beginning on the day? Or is that the deadline? What happens to application sent before then; are they thrown in the trash?

I sent an e-mail off to the school three weeks ago. I received my reply earlier this week: Nov. 1 was the deadline. I guess I won't be studying at Peking University.

(Prospective students can access this accurate information only when the site is working. Many parts of the school's English Web site seem to be frequently down.)

Beijing Normal University's Website features slick graphics and interface, but this element of sophistication is just a veneer on an application which must be printed and faxed to China. Yes, faxed.

After the application is received, the login part of the Web site stops working applicants can only "inquiry" their form. The inquiry section is blank.

Tsinghua University is the "M.I.T. of Asia," but their Web site is more the "Hudson Valley Community College of Northwest Beijing." Their incredibly slow Web site wins points for at least having clear information, but accessing the relevant parts for international students requires avoiding the two most obvious choices (both dead ends) and selecting a small menu on the bottom of the screen.

I want to be admitted to these schools, so I can learn about Beijing in-person, not through a Web site. But for now, this site is my portal to these institutions of higher learning. And what a dirty, foggy porthole it is.